Teaching Emotion Regulation With Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills

happy and sad on a pair of shoes

Emotion regulation represents one of the core skill modules in Dialectical Behavior Therapy and addresses a fundamental challenge many clients face in managing intense emotional experiences. Whether working with clients diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder or those struggling with emotional reactivity across various presentations, DBT's emotion regulation skills provide practical, evidence-based tools for building emotional resilience. This guide explores effective approaches for teaching these essential skills in clinical practice.

Understanding Emotion Regulation in DBT

Emotion regulation in DBT focuses on helping clients understand, manage, and modify emotional experiences and responses. The model recognizes that some individuals have heightened emotional sensitivity, react more intensely to emotional stimuli, and take longer to return to baseline after emotional arousal. These biological vulnerabilities, combined with invalidating environments, create patterns of emotional dysregulation that impact functioning across life domains.

DBT conceptualizes emotion regulation not as eliminating emotions or staying calm at all times, but rather as experiencing emotions without being controlled by them. This distinction matters because many clients have received messages that their emotions are wrong, too much, or should be suppressed. DBT validates emotional experiences while teaching skills for managing them more effectively.

The emotion regulation module teaches clients to identify and label emotions accurately, understand the function emotions serve, reduce vulnerability to emotional reactivity, and decrease emotional suffering. These skills work together to create lasting changes in how clients experience and respond to their emotional lives.

The Model for Describing Emotions

Teaching clients to observe and describe emotions using DBT's model creates clarity around emotional experiences that often feel overwhelming and confusing. The model breaks down emotional episodes into prompting events, interpretations, biological responses, facial and body expressions, action urges, and actions taken. Understanding each component helps clients identify intervention points.

Prompting events are the situations, interactions, or triggers that begin an emotional response. Many clients believe emotions appear randomly, but identifying prompting events reveals patterns and predictability. Even when events seem minor, understanding what triggered an emotional response provides valuable information about vulnerabilities and sensitivities.

Interpretations and thoughts about the prompting event significantly influence emotional intensity. Two people can experience the same event but have completely different emotional responses based on their interpretations. Teaching clients to notice their thoughts during emotional episodes highlights opportunities for cognitive interventions.

Biological responses include changes in heart rate, breathing, muscle tension, and other physical sensations accompanying emotions. Many clients focus exclusively on physical sensations without connecting them to specific emotions. Learning to recognize physical signatures of different emotions improves emotional awareness and early intervention.

Action urges represent impulses to behave in particular ways when experiencing emotions. Anger prompts urges to attack or defend, fear creates urges to escape, and sadness generates urges to withdraw. Understanding that urges differ from actions empowers clients to make conscious choices about behavior even when experiencing intense emotions.

Building Skills for Reducing Emotional Vulnerability

The acronym PLEASE represents skills for reducing biological vulnerability to emotional reactivity through attention to physical health and wellness. These foundational skills create stability that makes other emotion regulation strategies more effective.

Physical Illness

Treating physical illness promptly and taking prescribed medications as directed prevents physical health problems from increasing emotional vulnerability.

Eating

Eating regular, balanced meals maintains stable blood sugar and energy levels, reducing irritability and emotional reactivity throughout the day.

Avoid Mood-Altering Substances

Limiting or eliminating alcohol and drugs prevents the emotional instability and heightened reactivity these substances create, particularly during withdrawal or comedown periods.

Sleep

Maintaining consistent sleep schedules and getting adequate rest reduces emotional sensitivity and improves capacity for managing difficult emotions.

Exercise

Regular physical activity regulates mood, reduces stress hormones, and improves overall emotional resilience through neurobiological mechanisms.

Many clients initially resist PLEASE skills as too basic or disconnected from their emotional struggles. However, helping them experiment with improving just one area often reveals powerful impacts on emotional stability, building motivation for sustained practice.

Increasing Positive Emotional Experiences

The acronym ABC represents skills for actively building positive emotions rather than waiting for happiness to arrive spontaneously. Many clients with chronic emotional pain have stopped engaging in activities that generate positive emotions, creating a cycle of emotional deprivation.

1. Accumulate Positive Experiences

Building positive experiences in both the short term through pleasant activities and long term through working toward valued goals creates a buffer against negative emotions and increases overall life satisfaction.

2. Build Mastery

Engaging in activities that create feelings of accomplishment and competence, even small ones, improves self-efficacy and mood while providing evidence of capability.

3. Cope Ahead

Preparing for difficult situations by rehearsing coping skills and imagining successful navigation of challenges reduces anxiety and increases confidence in handling future stressors.

Teaching these skills requires addressing beliefs that positive experiences are frivolous, undeserved, or won't help. Many clients struggle with guilt about experiencing pleasure or joy, particularly when others are suffering. Validating these concerns while gently challenging avoidance of positive experiences supports skill building.

Managing Emotional Reactivity in the Moment

When intense emotions arise, DBT teaches several strategies for managing the experience without making situations worse through impulsive or harmful actions. These in-the-moment skills complement longer-term emotion regulation strategies and provide tools for crisis situations.

Examining whether interpretations and judgments match objective reality helps clients recognize when thoughts amplify emotional responses beyond what situations warrant. This cognitive skill reduces suffering caused by inaccurate or catastrophic thinking patterns.

Acting opposite to emotion-driven action urges when emotions don't fit facts or when acting on urges would be ineffective in changing emotional experiences through behavioral activation. For example, approaching rather than avoiding when fear is unjustified, or engaging rather than withdrawing when sadness pulls toward isolation.

When emotions fit the facts and situations can be changed, active problem solving addresses the prompting event rather than just managing the emotional response. Teaching clients to distinguish between situations requiring acceptance and those requiring change supports effective coping.

Many clients need extensive practice in recognizing when each skill applies. Role-playing different scenarios and analyzing which strategies fit various situations builds flexibility and judgment in applying emotion regulation skills.

Teaching Mindfulness of Current Emotions

Mindfulness of current emotions involves observing and experiencing emotions without attempting to suppress, avoid, or escalate them. This skill seems paradoxical to many clients who believe controlling emotions means making them go away. However, attempting to suppress emotions often intensifies them and creates additional suffering.

The practice involves noticing when emotions arise, observing them without judgment, experiencing emotions as waves that rise and fall rather than permanent states, remembering that emotions are not facts about reality, and not acting on every emotion that arises. This mindful stance toward emotions reduces secondary emotions (emotions about emotions) that compound suffering.

Many clients discover that emotions they feared would overwhelm them actually pass more quickly when observed without resistance. Practicing mindfulness of emotions during low-intensity experiences builds capacity for applying the skill during more challenging moments. Encouraging clients to notice where emotions show up in their bodies and what thoughts accompany different feelings increases emotional awareness.

Teaching clients that all emotions serve functions, even painful ones, reduces shame and judgment about emotional experiences. Fear alerts to danger, anger signals boundary violations, sadness prompts seeking support, and joy reinforces positive experiences. Understanding emotional functions helps clients appreciate rather than condemn their emotional responses.

Applying Emotion Regulation Skills to Specific Presentations

While DBT was developed for Borderline Personality Disorder, emotion regulation skills benefit clients across diagnostic categories. Understanding various clinical presentations helps clinicians adapt skill teaching to specific needs and contexts.

Clients with depression often struggle with pervasive sadness, loss of pleasure, and urges to isolate or withdraw. Emotion regulation skills particularly relevant include opposite action to depression's withdrawal urges, accumulating positive experiences despite low motivation, and building mastery through small accomplishments. Helping depressed clients recognize how isolation and inactivity maintain their emotional state motivates behavioral activation.

Anxiety presentations benefit from checking the facts about feared outcomes, opposite action to anxiety's avoidance urges, and cope ahead strategies for anticipated stressors. Many anxious clients live in constant anticipation of future threats, making present-moment awareness through mindfulness particularly valuable.

Clients with trauma histories often experience emotional numbing alternating with overwhelming emotional intensity. PLEASE skills provide stability during treatment, while mindfulness of emotions helps clients develop tolerance for previously avoided feelings. Pacing skill introduction, carefully and emphasizing safety, prevents overwhelming traumatized clients.

Structuring Skills Training Sessions

Effective emotion regulation skills training requires structured, consistent practice rather than simply discussing concepts. Each session should include a review of homework practice, introduction or deepening of specific skills, in-session practice or role-play, and assignment of between-session practice.

Beginning with the assessment of current emotion regulation capacities helps identify which skills address the most pressing needs. Some clients lack basic emotional awareness and need extensive work identifying and labeling emotions before moving to regulation strategies. Others can identify emotions but struggle with managing intensity or choosing effective responses.

Using worksheets and handouts provides structure and reference materials that clients can use outside of sessions. The official DBT skills training manual includes numerous handouts and worksheets, though clinicians can also create adapted materials fitting their clients' needs and literacy levels. Encouraging clients to keep materials organized in a binder or folder supports ongoing reference and practice.

Creating opportunities for skills practice within sessions increases learning and confidence. Role-playing difficult situations, practicing opposite action, or completing a cope-ahead exercise together provides coaching and immediate feedback. Many clients need explicit permission and encouragement to try skills imperfectly rather than waiting until they feel completely confident.

Addressing Common Obstacles to Skills Practice

Despite the proven effectiveness of emotion regulation skills, many clients struggle with consistent practice outside therapy sessions. Understanding and addressing common obstacles increases skills generalization and long-term benefit.

Many clients intellectually understand skills but don't practice them when emotions intensify. This common challenge reflects the difficulty of accessing cognitive skills during high arousal states. Building capacity requires practicing skills repeatedly during low-intensity emotions so they become more automatic and accessible during crises. Encouraging clients to practice when calm rather than waiting for difficult moments improves skill accessibility.

Some clients resist skills practice because previous attempts to manage emotions have failed, creating hopelessness about change. Validating their experiences while framing DBT skills as different from past strategies builds willingness. Emphasizing that skills require practice and won't work perfectly immediately reduces pressure for instant results.

Secondary gain from emotional intensity, such as attention from others or validation that problems are real, can inadvertently reinforce emotional dysregulation. Helping clients identify needs currently met through emotional crises and finding alternative strategies for meeting those needs reduces this barrier. Discussing how improved emotion regulation actually improves relationships more than crisis behavior challenges beliefs that emotional intensity is necessary for connection.

Cultural factors influence emotional expression norms and willingness to engage in certain skills. Adapting skill teaching to fit clients' cultural contexts and values while maintaining the core principles of DBT demonstrates cultural competence and responsiveness. What counts as effective emotion regulation varies across contexts, and rigid application of Western emotional norms can harm rather than help diverse clients.

Integrating Emotion Regulation With Other Treatment

Emotion regulation skills work most effectively when integrated with comprehensive treatment addressing multiple life areas. For clients in full DBT programs, emotion regulation skills training occurs alongside individual therapy, phone coaching, and therapist consultation teams. However, many clients benefit from emotion regulation skills even outside comprehensive DBT.

Clinicians can integrate emotion regulation skills into various therapeutic approaches, including cognitive-behavioral therapy, trauma-focused treatment, and psychodynamic work. The skills complement rather than replace other interventions and provide practical tools clients can use immediately while working on deeper issues.

Coordinating with other providers when clients see multiple practitioners ensures consistent messages and reinforcement of skills practice. Communicating with prescribers about how medications interact with skill-building efforts or with other therapists about which skills clients are learning prevents confusion and supports integration. Always obtaining appropriate releases and maintaining clear professional boundaries facilitates effective collaboration.

Balancing validation and change represents a core dialectic in DBT that applies particularly to emotion regulation work. Clients need both acknowledgment that their emotional experiences make sense, given their histories and encouragement to develop new ways of managing emotions. Overemphasis on either validation or change undermines treatment, while holding both simultaneously creates conditions for growth.

Moving Forward with Confidence

Teaching emotion regulation skills through DBT provides clients with practical, evidence-based tools for managing emotional experiences more effectively. By structuring skills training thoughtfully, addressing obstacles to practice, and integrating skills with comprehensive treatment, clinicians can help clients build emotional resilience that transforms their lives. Consider exploring additional training opportunities to deepen your expertise in delivering DBT and emotion regulation interventions effectively.

You can learn more about this in one of our recent home study courses.


Ready to expand your clinical toolkit? Explore our continuing education courses designed specifically for mental health professionals.

Ray W. Christner, PsyD, NCSP

Licensed psychologist with 20+ years specializing in cognitive-behavioral therapy. Co-founder of Psyched to Practice, helping therapists translate research into practice. Published author, national conference presenter, and clinical consultant. Expertise in evidence-based interventions for anxiety, mood disorders, and child/adolescent therapy. Member of APA, NASP, and ABCT.

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